Chainsaw remake fails to cut mustard

1974’s ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre’ is a landmark horror classic, noted for its realistic and graphic content. Like any successful horror film, it was followed by a line of increasingly unnecessary sequels.

First, came a bizarre spoof comedy sequel in 1986. Two more sequels followed, then a remake, then a prequel to the remake - all attempting to take the series in a new direction. ‘Texas Chainsaw 3D’ is the latest in the series.

It opens with a recap of the first film’s ending, the story beginning immediately after, in 1974.

When murderous family the Sawyer’s are killed by angry townsfolk, Leatherface and a baby relative are left as the only survivors. The baby’s mother is killed by a townsman, who raises the child as his own.

It’s present day and the baby is Heather, the main character. Heather’s grandmother dies and she is bequeathed the Sawyer family house - a plot as cliché as it gets.

Heather is joined on a trip to the house by three friends and a hitch-hiker, who serve no purpose except to die as graphically as possible at the hands of Leatherface, who still lives there.

The film was bad, but near the hour mark, when Leatherface inexplicably chases Heather through a fun fair, it became a struggle to watch.

There’s nothing to enjoy here – all of the characters are unlikable, either evil or moronic, and there are no surprises to be found.

Watching this formulaic, intelligence-insulting film was a miserable experience. ‘Texas Chainsaw 3D’ is awful on every level.

Distributor Lionsgate have already announced plans for ‘Texas Chainsaw 2’, as well as a potential six more films.

It’s safe to say that everything that can be done with this franchise, has been done already - it’s not going to get any better.

By Kelan Headley