PSNI Craigavon were on the hoverboard on Saturday probing the ‘theft’ of a De Lorean owned by Marty McFly in Portadown.
And they nabbed the offender, Kylo Ren, who claimed he had just ‘borrowed it’.
The Star Wars character, who was at the Stars and Stripes party in the People’s Park, claimed he needed the De Lorean to get to 15 December 2017 for the release of his new movie.
In a post on the PSNI Craigavon Facebook page, the police comedian said: “No it’s not 26th October 1985. This is not a PSNI De Lorean. I haven’t got a PSNI self-drying high visibility jacket and yes I tie my own laces, thank you! (For all the younger Facebook followers ask Mum and Dad)
“Unfortunately whilst carrying out foot patrol in The People’s Park, Portadown at the Stars and Stripes event, Portadown Neighbourhood Policing Team received a report of the theft of a vehicle, a De Lorean to be exact. (Not sure how road worthy it is and Customs will be informed about its unusual choice of fuel - the cheek of him asking for my banana skin)
“Now at first when the owner of the stolen De Lorean told me his name was Marty McFly, I thought, I know that name from my past but I will come back to that one in the Future. My suspicions grew when I received the description of the alleged offender, he was a warrior strong with the force and his temper as fiery as his unconventional lightsaber (no match for my baton or Police lightsaber as I like to call it!)
“I was all for hopping on the PSNI Hoverboard, but my Sergeant kindly informed me that we are on a tight budget and to use my wee size 5s to catch the offender. So off I went around the Park bumping into all the adults and children enjoying their day, but no sign of thon De Lorean...
“Low and behold I eventually caught the offender, his name was Kylo Ren, who informed me he had just “borrowed” the De Lorean as his Comand Shuttle was in for a service and he was desperately trying to get to 15th December 2017 for the release of his new movie! Tell that one to the Magistrate Mr Ren, he must have thought I was born yesterday! So Marty McFly got his beloved De Lorean back and yes I have seized the lightsaber (Please let me keep it Sergeant?????)
“Back to reality, Portadown Neighbourhood Policing Team would like to thank all motorists, members of the public and residents for their patience throughout the day as the area was extremely busy with traffic. We all think that this was a fantastic event where everyone enjoyed their day out, even me, the wee peeler who handcuffed Kylo Ren (now you don’t hear that every day!)”